When using wood pieces, chips or chunks on your grill or smoker the sign of a good dry wood and clean smoke - that will flavor the meat - is seeing blue smoke escaping out of the vents. If you see white smoke it is one sign the wood is too wet, un-seasoned and you may find a bitter taste on and in the meat.
The best oils to use when grilling meat with direct high heat are high-temperature (smoke-point) oils like peanut, canola, safflower and cottonseed. These oils will better withstand the high heat required for searing while butter, olive oil and other unprocessed or cold processed oils will burn and turn bitter.
Wet meat steams and dry meat browns. Remember to dry off steaks, chops and other meat prior to placing it on the grates or in the cooking chamber.
Ask the butcher or go online to check out the cut of meat you are planning to cook to determine the best method of cooking. Lean cuts require quick searing and are generally marinated prior to cooking while cuts with more internal fat will grill nicely with nothing more than a little bit of salt and pepper and a quick spritz of high temp oil to keep them from sticking.
If you oil the grates of your grill prior to cooking on it and the oil smokes - it's not doing any good, it's burning away. So spritz the meat with a light touch of high-temp cooking oil to help even the heat transfer from the grate to the meat - that reduces sticking.
Crumpled newspaper in the bottom of a charcoal chimney is usually a much better way to start a charcoal fire than with lighter fluid. BUT if you must use lighter fluid, just sprinkle it on one or two briquettes and light them immediately - to use the vapors of the propellant before they soak into the charcoal.
Consider using a lump or natural wood charcoal that isn't formed into briquettes when grilling steaks and fish. You'll like the flavor of the clean smoke with no petroleum additives.
Experiment with the height of grate from the source of the heat. If using charcoal - you may use less and keep the grate closer to the coals to get the hottest sear possible, then allow the meat to finish away from direct heat.
Banking coals on either side or back and front of your grill will provide an yet even 'indirect' heat that's perfect for slow cooking roasts, turkeys or even starting steaks that you finish over direct heat.
One of the secrets of a well built charcoal fire is the charcoal emits a low level of infrared energy - and it cooks differently than either hot air of indirect heat when the meat placed directly in line of the infrared.
For the same reasons you wouldn't cook food in a dirty frying pan, keeping your grates clean after every cook is important. Old food isn't seasoning - it's crud. A clean grate is less likely to be sticky and will last longer.
Seasoning cooking grates made of raw metal like unpolished stainless steel or cast iron is a way to protect them and to help them become nearly non-stick, the way a well seasoned cast iron skillet works.
Make it a regular habit to clean out the fire box and hood of your grill to remove build-up of smoke and grease. These are fire hazards and, during particularly long cooks can actually catch fire and/or smoke - adding unwanted flavors to your fresh food.
When starting a charcoal fire it's better to use just a few briquettes to get things started and then build your fire from that.